I am a 22 year old guy. I have never had sex. Actually I have never even kissed a girl before. I have only ever been on 1 date in my life. And honestly I feel really depressed because of this. Whenever I think about this, I am always reminded that I am the guy that has never been worth kissing or dating.
This is not even because I am consevrative. I am actually very liberal. I am up for anything. It isn’t even due to a lack of trying. I am on 4 dating apps and honestly it’s exhausting. I barely get any matches and most people I talk to don’t even proceed beyond a few messages. I usually just get ghosted. idk what I am doing wrong.
My only romantic expereince was a girlfriend I had for 6 months 5 years ago. SHe told me she was conservative and therefore wasn’t comfortable doing anything sexual. But she cheated on my by sleeping with one of my friends while we were together. So clearly she was uncomfortable about me and not activity itself.
I have a lot of close female friends with whom I have very platonic relationships with. But I really crave something more. I really crave intimacy. It’s not just sex but just to feel loved, feel cared for, to feel like someone in this world actually gives a shit about what happens to me. I want some level of exclusivity in my relationships. I also want to have sex with someone I love and someone who loves me and to feel that connection. I want something more than just friendship.
When I see other people in happy relationships, it makes me sad, jealous and envious. I am severely depressed because of this and idk what to do. I have been told to just focus on improving myself and that i will find a girlfriend when it is time but that is clearly bullshit advice because nothing good seems to be happening. Am I really that unappealing? I feel so lost.